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in Communication

14 Hilarious Programming Quotes

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Sometimes a good quote is all you need as a pick me up on a difficult day. Sometimes they can be inspirational, other times they’re just funny. If you’re in search of inspiration, you’ll have to come back another day. All we have for you today are 14 hilarious programming quotes that will help give you a second wind in the workday. Enjoy!

1. “Programming is like sex. One mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life.”
-Michael Sinz

2. “Documentation is the castor oil of programming. Managers think it’s good for programmers and programmers hate it.”
– Gerald Weinberg

3. Premature optimization is the root of all evilĀ in programming.”
– C.A.R. Hoare

4. “If debugging is the process of removing software bugs, then programming must be the process of putting them in.”
– Edsger Dijstra

5. “Always code as if the guy who ends up maintaining your code will be a violent psychopath who knows where you live.”
– Rick Osborne

6. “Linux is only free if your time has no value.”
– Jaime Zawinski

7. “There are two ways to write error-free programs; only the third one works.”
– Alan J. Perlis

8. “Deleted code is debugged code.”
– Jeff Sickel

9. “A C program is like a fast dance on a newly waxed dance floor by people carrying razors.”
– Waldi Ravens

10. “Software undergoes beta testing shortly before it’s released. Beta is Latin for ‘still doesn’t work.'”

11. Don’t worry if it doesn’t work right. If everything did, you’d be out of a job.”
– Mosher’s Law of Software Engineering

12. “PHP is a minor evil perpetrated and created by incompetent amateurs, whereas Perl is a great and insidious evil, perpetrated by skilled but perverted professionals.”
– Jon Ribbens

13. “Programming is like kicking yourself in the face, sooner or later your nose will bleed.”
– Kyle Woodbury

14. “Most of you are familiar with the virtues of a programmer. There are three of course: laziness, impatience, and hubris.”
– Larry Wall

Do you have any programmer quotes you want to add? Let us know!

*This list was compiled from existing lists found here, here, here, here, and here.

[Image Courtesy of Ryan McGuire]